The Onion Daily Dispatch - March 27, 2012

Tue Mar 27, 2012 www.theonion.com

Homesick Kid On Sleepover Needs To Just Tough It The Fuck Out 03.27.12 MEDFORD, OR—Considering that everyone else at Kevin Brown's sleepover party is having a great time and not freaking out about missing their mommies and daddies, 10-year-old Brandon Thompson needs to just man up and tough it the fuck out because this... News in Brief » Lawyers Opposing Health Care Law Cite Kids-With-Pre-Existing-Conditions-Can-Go-Fuck-Themselves Clause American Voices » Supreme Court Begins ‘Obamacare’ Hearings "Not with my tax dollars they won't!" opinion » Sometimes I Feel Like I’m The Only One Who Gives A Shit About Rich, Lustrous Hair by Marcus Russo , President and CEO, Pantene By Marcus Russo, President and CEO, Pantene Radio News » Area Man Too Busy For His Buddy Phil, Eh?

featured section: » Letters To The Editor » To The Editor: Enclosed is a copy of my song "Let's Get A Looky-Loo At Your How-Do-You-Do!" You know a bunch of people, so how's about giving Doug here a break and slipping it into the hands of Ray Stevens or a talent of Ray Stevens–like stature? Thanks! — Doug "The Mug," Ann Arbor, MI Most Popular » Homesick Kid On Sleepover Needs To Just Tough It The Fuck Out Women Voters Can't Help Fawning Over Sexist GOP Lawyers Opposing Health Care Law Cite Kids-With-Pre-Existing-Conditions-Can-Go-Fuck-Themselves Clause Greeting Each Other Like Normal Human Beings Impossible For Local Friends Area Man Too Busy For His Buddy Phil, Eh? Supreme Court Begins ‘Obamacare’ Hearings

If you do not want to receive anymore emails from us, please click the following link unsubscribe. To unsubscribe via postal mail please send your request to: 536 Broadway New York NY, 10012 Please include the email address at which you have been contacted. All of our emails are sent from the domain http://www.theonion.com.