Animal Facing Extinction In 2003 Fucks Its Way Back - May 14, 2013

Tue May 14, 2013 www.theonion.com

Animal Facing Extinction In 2003 Fucks Its Way Back 05.13.13 CAMBRIDGE, UNITED KINGDOM—Saying that the species knew it had to start fucking and start fucking fast, officials from the International Union for Conservation of Nature announced Monday that loggerhead turtles—marine reptiles considered critic... News in Brief » Doctors: Cancer Patients Who Watched The Onion’s Amazon Pilot Daily Showed Signs Of Remission American Voices » Barbara Walters Announces Retirement “Good luck to her in her next job!” opinion » The 'Great Gatsby' Movie Was Nowhere Near As Good As The Book 'The Hit' By David Baldacci by Matt Rosensteele By Matt Rosensteele Radio News » New Crispy Snack Cracker To Ease Crushing Pain Of Modern Life

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