The Onion Daily Dispatch - September 10, 2012

Mon Sep 10, 2012 www.theonion.com

Number Of Users Who Actually Enjoy Facebook Down To 4 09.10.12 WASHINGTON—A comprehensive and groundbreaking new report released Monday by the Pew Research Center’s Internet and American Life Project has found that only four users of Facebook derive pleasure of any kind from the popular social networking ... News in Brief » Area Woman Dumped On 15-Week Anniversary American Voices » Hang-Gliding Putin Leads Flock Of Birds “That’s great for the birds, but the people of Russia require Putin’s gentle, guiding presence elsewhere.” opinion » Good Evening, It's An Honor To Be Used As A Political Prop By My Husband's Campaign by Michelle Obama, First Lady Of The United States By Michelle Obama Radio News » Unicycling Bear's Agent Has Long List Of Demands

featured section: » Horoscope » Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 All of your questions will soon be answered, including what's that noise, who turned off all the lights, and why—why won't it stop feeding on us? Most Popular » Number Of Users Who Actually Enjoy Facebook Down To 4 Obama: 'Help Us Destroy Jesus And Start A New Age Of Liberal Darkness' The Week In Pictures Biden Says Life Better Than It Was 4 Years Ago But Nothing Can Touch Summer Of '87 Everyone In Improv Troupe Balding Obama's 19-Year-Old Son Makes Rare Appearance At DNC

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