The Onion Daily Dispatch - July 23, 2012

Mon Jul 23, 2012 www.theonion.com

Blood-Drenched, Berserk CEO Demands More Web Videos 07.23.12 NEW YORK—Screaming at the top of his lungs like a deranged lunatic and drenched in his own blood as well as the blood of his employees, Grind.com CEO Jeff Potkul went berserk Friday and demanded his staff produce more web video content or he would ... News in Brief » Romney Requiring Potential Running Mates To Write 5,000 Word Essay On Favorite Things About Money American Voices » Microsoft Announces First-Ever Quarterly Loss “What they should do is use their immense size to box their smaller competitors out of the market. Have they tried that?” opinion » My Year Volunteering As A Teacher Helped Educate A New Generation Of Underprivileged Kids vs. Can We Please, Just Once, Have A Real Teacher by Brandon Mendez, James Miller Elementary School Student Point My Year Volunteering As A Teacher Helped Educate A New Generation Of Underprivileged Kids When I graduated college last year, I was certain I wanted to make a real difference in the world. After 17 years of education, I felt an obligation to share ... Radio News » Multi-Vitamin Snubs Magnesium

featured section: » Letters To The Editor » Dear The Onion, Know what really sucks? Famine. — Elizabeth Culver, Pueblo, CO Most Popular » Blood-Drenched, Berserk CEO Demands More Web Videos Sadly, Nation Knows Exactly How Colorado Shooting's Aftermath Will Play Out Romney Requiring Potential Running Mates To Write 5,000 Word Essay On Favorite Things About Money Additional Findings Show Every Penn State Student, Alumnus Also Knew About Ongoing Child Molestation God Admits Humans Not Most Impressive Creation Some Fucking Guy At Warner Bros. Wondering What Shooting Of 12 Means For Ticket Sales

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