The Onion Daily Dispatch - June 24, 2011

Fri Jun 24, 2011 www.theonion.com

Mother Of Slaying Victim Glad It Was Onion Reporter Who Knocked On Her Door Half An Hour After Funeral 06.23.11 BALTIMORE—In mourning following the early morning slaying of her 16-year-old daughter by an unknown assailant in Broening Park, Grace Palmer expressed joy and gratitude Tuesday that a reporter from The Onion, and not some other newspaper, had come t... News in Brief » Mother Of Slaying Victim Glad It Was Onion Reporter Who Knocked On Her Door Half An Hour After Funeral American Voices » Millions Have Never Read The Onion "At least they still get most of The Onion’s intrepid reporting once it's ripped off by The Wall Street Journal." opinion » I Shall Now Exact My Final Revenge Upon That Jack-Ass Joseph Pulitzer by T. Herman Zweibel Publisher Emeritus (photo circa 1911) I was roused from an unusually restful sleep yesterday for reasons utterly alien to a news-paper publisher: a meeting with the normally biddable and pliant Onion Board of Directors and, more unusual even than that, with the burgeoning horde of misc... Radio News » Bakery's Closing Nets Man Ton Of Free Eclairs

featured section: » Letters To The Editor » Dear The Onion, Watch out. I think some people are out to get you. Namely, my wife and me. — John and Suzanne Minksley, Dearborn, MI Most Popular » Lazy, Illiterate Pulitzer Board Should At Least Be Able To Watch This Fucking Video Recap Onion Ignored By Pulitzer Committee Joad Cressbeckler: Homosexuality A Necessity On Cold Mountaintops How Much Of The Reporting In This Issue Is Worthy Of Recognition By An Organization That Presents Awards For Outstanding Journalism? Millions Have Never Read The Onion Reporter Spends Month Undercover In Mass Grave

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