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Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Exercise Machines Are For Cripples

June 13th, 2012Top Story

Exercise Machines Are For Cripples

By Hamilton Nolan

Exercise Machines Are For CripplesWhen you walk into a gym, or "gymnasium" as they're known on the streets, you'll find three distinct areas: a "cardio area," where boring people are doing things I don't even care about; a free weights area, where people are doing exercise; and a fitness machine area, where crippled people are doing physical rehab. "But hey," you exclaim stupidly, "I do the fitness machines, and I am not crippled!"

Well then friend, I'm sorry to tell you: "You are doing it rong," as the kids say. (Catering to the youth demographic: check plus).

Here is an alarming but mostly true story: once upon a time, a savvy businessman named Arthur Jones invented the Nautilus fitness machine, which kept a steady amount of resistance on the user throughout the movement. Nautilus machines only worked one muscle group at a time, so gyms bought entire suites of Nautilus machines to make up a full "circuit." People went around, doing each machine in turn, and voila, they had exercised their whole body. Gyms made money. People were happy to pay a lot of money to join a gym that featured hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of fancy plastic equipment, rather than just five hundred bucks worth of jagged scrap iron in a fetid pile (a real gym). Arthur Jones made money. And American gymgoers became a bunch of people who thought they were strong because they could move the pin on the chest press machine all the way to the bottom of the rack.

They were not strong.

People perceived workout machines as shiny, fancy evolutions that were superior to boring old free weights. Bonus: they were much easier, too! Do you see where I'm going with this, America? It was a sham! A sham! A sham! The whole theory! The whole idea! A crock! A fake thingamajig, is what it was, the whole idea that sitting in a fixed position and moving one single muscle through a rigidly controlled range of motion was a better way to work out, than just lifting a god damn weight. It is not. It is much less hardcore. The best exercise you can do with a Nautilus machine is to deadlift the Nautilus machine into a dumpster.

Exercise Machines Are For CripplesThe body is one big complete system of muscles that work together. When you lift a barbell over your head or pick it up from the ground or squat with it or do a pullup or a row or some other actual real life exercise, many of the muscles in your body are working together to lift (and constantly stabilize) the weight, in a useful approximation of some task which you might actually do in the real world, one day. Exercise machines, by contrast, are designed to isolate single muscles or muscle groups, thereby taking the real world design of your body's muscles out back and shooting it right in the noggin. Exercises with free weights are harder, and they make you stronger, and they are one million times more useful than any kind of exercise machine bullshit, so you should just lift free weights. Okay? If the alleged "personal trainer" at your shitty gym tries to "train" you by walking you around the gym floor and telling you how to do various exercise machines, you punch him right in the nuts, and ejaculate "That is not hardcore!" Is that clear enough? And then you can feel superior to all the weakling suckers on the weight machines, and snicker at them under your breath, as long as you do it with the high level of class exhibited in this column, for example.

There is one class of people who are allowed to use the exercise machines: cripples. In this category I include you, me, and anyone who is old, decrepit, or recovering from one injury or another. But you are only allowed to use the machines for the movements that might otherwise cause you to break, or die, and when you are better, and stronger, you should stop using the stupid machines, and go back to free weights. For example, I have a fucked up left shoulder, so sometimes I use the machine that simulates the behind-the-neck press, rather than doing the behind-the-neck press with a loaded barbell, which might be fine, but then again could, with the merest wisp of misplaced movement, cause all the tendons and ligaments in my left shoulder to pop and tear in a great and painful rending of flesh and then my left arm collapses like an imploding old building and the barbell comes crashing to the floor like "Kabloosh!" with a great ruckus, scraping the skin off the back of my neck on the way down, and the gym goes silent as the echoing of the dropped weights is eclipsed in volume by my wailing, "My shoulder! Ahhhh fuck my shoulder, Jesus dang shoot that one smarts," and the lengthy physical rehab that follows causes me take to my couch and become a recluse and lose much of my self-esteem and even years later, when I find a girl to marry, it ends in divorce, because I never really recovered that twinkling je ne sais quois I possessed before what I would only refer to thereafter as "the accident."

So I use the machine. But I don't like it. And neither should you. Tigers don't use any god damn Nautilus machines. (They use free weights.) (Or would if they were capable.)

[Images by Jim Cooke]

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10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of Prometheus

June 13th, 2012Top Story

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of Prometheus

By Charlie Jane Anders

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of PrometheusRidley Scott's Prometheus is one of the year's most visually stunning movies. It's full of astonishing images that live on in your mind's eye after you leave the theater — and every single one of those images was the result of hours of work by a team of designers who worked literally around the clock.

We spoke to six designers who worked on Prometheus, and delved into the untold mysteries of this film's creation. Here are 10 things you absolutely did not know about the design of Prometheus — plus some exclusive concept art.

The exclusive image above comes from Prometheus: The Art of the Film, released by Titan Books. It's a gorgeous look inside the design process of this film, from its conception as a straight-up Alien prequel to the finished movie. It's chock full of beautiful, scary and moody art. See the full version of that image below. All other images below are courtesy of Steven Messing, and some of them have appeared elsewhere.

For this article, we spoke to production designer Arthur Max, concept artists David Levy, Ben Procter and Steven Messing, creature designer Carlos Huante and senior art director Mark Homes. Plus writer Jon Spaihts.

With that out of the way, here are 10 secrets we learned about Prometheus:

10. We could have gotten to see Mars being terraformed.
The designers did "some very nice work" on the orbiting space station where Peter Weyland has his office, according to production designer Arthur Max. This included "a very interesting space colony that was orbiting around the planet Mars. There was a base for terraforming Mars." This whole sequence got cut before shooting, because it was too lengthy and slowed down the pacing of the film. But you can glimpse a teeny bit of it in the hologram released by the Weyland Corporation.

Writer Jon Spaihts says his drafts involved a meeting in Weyland's office — which at various times was either on a space station, or actually on the surface of Mars, right in the middle of the terraforming project. "Terraforming was much more Mr. Weyland's burning dream in my drafts," says Spaihts.

Oh, and as for why Weyland is played by Guy Pearce in old-man makeup, Spaihts says Damon Lindelof's script showed the android David going inside Weyland's dreams while he was in hypersleep — and in his dreams, Weyland is a young man, on a yacht surrounded by beautiful women. These dream conversations got cut, but Pearce's casting was already locked in. Scott had originally wanted to cast Max von Sydow as Peter Weyland. (In Spaiht's script versions, Weyland isn't aboard the Prometheus at all — instead, there's a hidden squad of company soldiers.)

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of Prometheus9. Any resemblance between the Prometheus and Serenity is purely accidental.
"The Serenity was absolutely not a reference," says Ben Procter, who did most of the design work on the exterior of the Prometheus — in spite of some fans' insistence that the movie's ship looks a bit like the famous vessel from Firefly. But there were hints of the Nostromo in there, and maybe a bit of a shout-out to artist Chris Foss, who worked on the original Alien.

The early work on the Prometheus was done by Steve Burg, who left the project early on. Says Procter:

Steve's early illustrations showcased the major features which were of interest to Ridley and Arthur early on — the four main thrusters which could pivot radically for different modes of flight, a descending airlock which allowed vehicular access to the planet surface, and an overall imposing "oil platform" look when the craft is standing on the ground with all of its work lighting on. There's no question the ship has Nostromo DNA in it, but in continuing Steve's work I also kept in mind Ridley and Arthur's desire for more aeronautical elegance and performance. It's a flagship prospecting vessel, not a "tow truck", and Ridley said it could hover and dive "like a Blackhawk". The final result is meant to look muscular but beautiful, with a speedy look but also enough exposed hardware to feel tough and functional. I explored many color schemes and the one Ridley picked is actually a bit Fossian with its bold black and yellow stripes.

Adds Levy, "As opposed to the Nostromo, a very rudimentary ship, Prometheus is a Rolls Royce." Levy worked on the expedition Rover, with Joe Hiura, and aimed for something that looked "modern, scientific and very well thought out, as opposed to military or derelict." Everyone involved with the film had "a real passion for space travel," and was constantly consulting NASA imagery for the latest designs, adds Levy.

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of Prometheus8. The movie's creature designer also worked on Alien Vs. Predator
And Carlos Huante says the two experiences were very, very different. (You can see his designs for AVP here.) Says Huante, "Prometheus was a very serious approach to things that already existed in a successful universe that Ridley himself created. We were imagining the origins of some of those creatures and it was very high minded. I mean, real science fiction, where science played a big part." Meanwhile, the AVP film "was more about what would look cool as a different type of Predator helmet." The guiding principle behind working on AVP was to keep the art direction consistent and everything cool-looking, because it was more about fun than about making a serious film. Huante says he enjoyed working on both, but Prometheus was special because Ridley Scott was so personally involved in everything.

7. Pretty much all of those sets were built practically and modeled in 3-D.
And that includes the weird caverns and chambers on the moon LV-223, as well as the interiors of the ship Prometheus. Says Ben Procter, "While some sets were redressed as different locations within the ship, there was still a lot of acreage to wander, if you were so inclined. The garage airlock was just enormous — nearly 200 feet long, if I recall correctly. The giant landing foot that explorers crash into during the sandstorm was built practically, up to a height of 28 feet."

And David Levy says that the Med Pod where Noomi Rapace gives herself emergency surgery needed to be "built and function in real life." The Med Pod went through a lot of different versions, including some early, more "opaque and heavy" versions, says Arthur Max.

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of PrometheusArthur Max, the production designer, says he pushed the concept artists to draw set dressings in 3-D so that the set designers could work from those 3-D schematics. The concept artists working on the film had to get used to creating set dressings that could be rotated in 3-D and viewed from every angle, something that they weren't used to doing. "I introduced a kind of 3-D set design process, that ended up on the workshop floor that was very useful," says Max — and this allowed huge and complicated sets to go up in a hurry.

"You can design anything," says Max, but "Ridley wants the set built. He doesn't want surprises. He wants feet and inches." Everything had to be able to fit into the space available, so you would know right off the bat that it was achievable. The only drawback of this method was that it allowed people to work so quickly that sometimes Ridley would ask for changes in a particular set — and the Los Angeles-based artists would rush those revisions to the U.K. set designers, only to find that the set had already been built.

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of PrometheusSome of the set pieces were 35 to 40 feet high, and the sculptors needed to be able to cut up huge chunks of polystyrene in bulk, so they could be fit together, says Max. So having incredibly detailed 3-D renderings from the concept artists helped them to know how these should look. Meanwhile, "some of the steel work was very big and curving, and specific shapes that they needed to be able to measure," says Max. "These things were all done in differnet workshops and different stages, and on different days. They all needed to be able to come together and fit together." And it all had to come in under budget, on time.

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of Prometheus6. Ridley Scott was constantly sketching and storyboarding.
Ridley Scott is famous for his "Ridleygrams," in which he not only storyboards his movies, but does tons of his own sketches and ideas. At left is a Ridleygram from Prometheus, via Alien Prequel News. Says Procter, "Ridley draws all the time. It's fantastic. Every meeting left us with a pile of Ridleygrams, often loose sketches rather than formal storyboards. These were always scanned and filed, and often proved invaluable." And Messing says that Scott "would often come in and sit next to us and draw for hours at a time. That truly was a unique experience." According to Levy, the job of the concept artists was often to take Scott's sketches and flesh them out, adding lots of variations for him to choose from but staying close to Scott's original idea. Says Levy, "He is an incredible artist, with an amazing eye for design and compositions."

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of Prometheus5. The surface of LV-223 is a mixture of real-life vistas from Earth and NASA images.
Messing worked heavily on the sequence where Prometheus lands on LV-223, based on Scott's storyboards. And there were two huge sources of inspiration for the view as you descend to the moon's surface: NASA reference imagery, "especially vortex cloud structures." And actual aerial plates, shot by Richard Stammers and his team, of real-life locations in Iceland and Wadi Rum. Says Messing, "A lot of the final environment work is a combination of real photography and 3d set extensions. Ridley and VFX Producer Alan Maris wanted to keep the film grounded in reality, and tried to shoot plate elements whenever possible."

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of PrometheusAs for the actual surface of LV-223, Messing says:

Most of the natural structures were drawn from the original film. The swooping rock pinnacles were toned down a bit as Ridley felt they were a bit too fantastical. He was a bit more reserved in this film and wanted the environment to feel believable. We looked at Olympus Mons on Mars and several large mountain structures on earth for reference. Ridley felt that once the ship broke through the planet's cloud layer we would see an amazing landscape — in the original the ship was shrouded in darkness and a storm with zero visibility — Ridley felt that he wanted to achieve the opposite here — scope and grandeur at a massive scale. We shot a lot of amazing plates in Wadi Rum and different regions in Iceland. I painted over dozens of these plates and gave Art Direction to the VFX team.

Levy adds that the team had a visit from NASA specialists, who talked about the potential look of different exo-planets, and these real-life scientific ideas informed a lot of the artwork. The team also had access to photos of ice being expulsed into the atmosphere of Saturn's moon Enceladus, and Levy talked a lot to the NASA team about different rare phenomena in our own solar system.

4. The Prometheus art team started very, very small.
Originally, says Max, the design team on Prometheus was just himself and artist Steve Burg, who came up with sketchy but "evocative" designs. At one point, they had two weeks to come up with a pitch session that presented the studio with designs for the whole movie, from start to end. "Truth be known, we repurposed some Alien stills that we painted over, because we had no time," says Max.

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of PrometheusAfter Burg left the project, Max hired a few new designers, but it remained a small team, trapped in a conference room 30 feet away from Ridley Scott's office. "Essentially, we had Ben Procter designing the Prometheus ship, David Levy working out vehicles, props, and various set pieces, and me focusing primarily on the planet environment and Alien spaceships/architecture," says Messing. "We all had to be quite versatile in our skill set. There was also Carlos Huante and Neville Page working on creatures remotely." According to Max, they covered every wall in the conference room with art, until they ran out of wallspace and had to resort to covering the windows, "going from a brightly lit room to a black box."

Later, it became a 24-hour art department, with people working in both L.A. and London, collaborating via Skype and sending files back and forth for people in both countries to modify.

3. There's an altar to H.R. Giger inside the "Head Room."
Says Messing:

Another set that I worked on was known as the "Head Room." This was a ceremonial room that contained hundreds of ampules beneath a giant sculpture of an Engineer's head. Julian Caldrow did an amazing job of working out all of the details for this environment and created the set drawings. The final set was built at full scale and was incredible to walk on. I also sculpted an altar area for this set that paid homage to Giger -it is a relief sculpture hanging from the wall and has the impression of an alien form with flowing structures surrounding it. There are a lot of easter eggs in this sculpture — including several hidden Giger motifs that were not used in the original film.

10 Things You Didn't Know About the Making of Prometheus2. A chiaroscuro-style balance of light and shadow is at the heart of the film's aesthetic.
The main guiding idea behind the aliens in Prometheus was their paleness, says Huante, the creature designer:

Once I realized that this film's timeline was taking place before the Giger-esque esthetic would come into effect, I started homing in on a design aesthetic [that] I felt would complement the beautiful Giger style that saturated the first film. I wanted everything white and embryonic. Ridley and I were right in tune with each other on this. I mean, Ridley was looking at paintings that had white ghost like creatures, as reference for the Engineers. I loved the idea of pale white and started developing that as an over-all concept for all the creatures.

And Messing says that some of the iconic shots in this film "pay homage to Chesley Bonestell with strong graphic elements of light and shadow." Other art references include old Giger drawings, national monuments, large installation sculptures — and the Crazy Horse monument in South Dakota.

Click to view 1. The creatures could have been much more monstrous.
Carlos Huante says he came up with some primitive, scary creatures, based on the real-life goblin shark. (At left: Some video of goblin sharks, that Huante says he shared with Ridley Scott.) There was the Deacon, which eventually turned into "that blue thing that comes out of the Engineer" at the end of the film — but Huante's version was very different. Also, there was a creature that everybody called the "Beluga Head," that he really wanted to make the cut, but sadly didn't. Both of these creatures were supposed to have "some of the mouth structure from the goblin shark, or at least the concept of how the mouth shot out," says Huante. "The Goblin is very delicate, and my creatures were not delicate. I wanted them to be elegant but wickedly strong."

Max adds that the designs for the creatures kept evolving into something that was "a bit too monstery." Ridley Scott really wanted to "keep it real" and avoid anything that looked too overtly monstrous. In the end, the creatures in the film were "collages of creatures, that were recombined for anatonmy and skin type," and they stayed "within the realm of the real." There was a lot of time spent visiting Natural History museums. Often, Ridley would decide that he liked the texture of a creature's head, and he wanted it all over the creature's body, which meant a very time-consuming total resculpt. "Yes, but I want it," Scott would reply.

For the creatures in this movie, Carlos Huante says he and Scott also pored over binders full of references, including natural creatures but also paintings by William Blake and J.M.W. Turner, and "books of classical sculpture" for the look of the Engineers. Early, Huante came up with some other types of precursors to the original film's face-hugger and Xenomorph, plus a "primitive Alien creature" that got cut.

Top image: Prometheus: The Book of the Film. Image is ™ & © 2012 Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. All Rights Reserved.

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Why Russians Are Obsessed With Dash-Cams

June 13th, 2012Top Story

Why Russians Are Obsessed With Dash-Cams

By Marina Galperina

Why Russians Are Obsessed With Dash-CamsIn Russia, everyone should have a camera on their dashboard. It's better than keeping a lead pipe under your seat for protection (but you might still want that lead pipe).

The conditions of Russian roads are perilous, with an insane gridlock in the city and gigantic ditches, endless swamps and severe wintry emptiness of the backroads and highways. Then there are large, lawless areas you don't just ride into, the police with a penchant for extortion and deeply frustrated drivers who want to smash your face.

Psychopaths are abundant on Russian roads. You best not cut anyone off or undertake some other type of maneuver that might inconvenience the 200-pound, six-foot-five brawling children you see on YouTube hopping out of their SUVs with their dukes up. They will go ballistic in a snap, drive in front of you, brake suddenly, block you off, jump out and run towards your vehicle. Next thing you start getting punches in your face because your didn't roll up your windows, or getting pulled out of the car and beaten because you didn't lock the doors.

These fights happen all the time and you can't really press charges. Point to your broken nose or smashed windows all you want. The Russian courts don't like verbal claims. They do, however, like to send people to jail for battery and property destruction if there's definite video proof. That is why there's a new, growing crop of dash-cam videos featuring would-be face-beaters backing away to the shouts of "You're on camera, fucker! I'm calling the cops!"

Click to view Dash-cam footage is the only real way to substantiate your claims in the court of law. Forget witnesses. Hit and runs are very common and insurance companies notoriously specialize in denying claims. Two-way insurance coverage is very expensive and almost completely unavailable for vehicles over ten years old–the drivers can only get basic liability. Get into a minor or major accident and expect the other party to lie to the police or better yet, flee after rear-ending you. Since your insurance won't pay unless the offender is found and sued, you'll see dash-cam videos of post hit and run pursuits for plate numbers.

And sometimes drivers back up or bump their pre-dented car into yours. It used to be a mob thing, with the accident-staging specialists working in groups. After the "accident," the offending driver–often an elderly lady–is confronted by a crowd of "witnesses," psychologically pressured and intimidated to pay up cash on the spot. Since the Age of the Dash-cam, hustle has withered from a flourishing enterprise to a dying trade, mainly thriving in the provinces where dash-cams are less prevalent.

And then, sometimes, someone will jump under your car at a crossing, laying on the asphalt, simulating a badly hurt pedestrian waiting for that cop conveniently parked nearby. This dramatic extortion scheme was common, until the Age of the Dash-cam. Oh, and there are such juicy, triumphant tales about of would-be extortion victims turning the scheme around and telling the cast members to pay them money or they're going to jail for this little performance! Don't try it.

While those lucky enough to traverse the Russian roads with an American or other Western passport are hassled less, the Russian Highway Patrol is notorious throughout their land for brutality, corruption, extortion and making an income on bribes. Dash-cams won't protect you from being extorted for cash, because your ass shouldn't have been speeding. It will however keep you safer from drunks in uniform, false accusations and unreasonable bribe hikes.

The other side of the Russian Wild Wild West is the sloppy online content policy. In the US, we can't really watch anything slightly more serious than a subway fight or one car rear-ending another, as diligent censors quickly nab any videos with bad injuries, too much blood or other overly violent content.

Russian websites go for the uncut, the horrible accidents–trucks flipping over, people being smashed into pieces and sedans flying up in the air and exploding. Given that television programing is mostly vacuous and heavily censored, dash-cam videos are very popular in Russia. It's uncensored–drama, comedy, tragedy, horror, thriller and educational genres fused into one super-genre of "dash-cam." Who needs Klitschko when you can watch to tough guys box in the street?

It's not all for kicks and voyeurism. The Ru CHP LiveJournal community is where all the major crashes, fights and deaths are aggregated. These are followed by a barrage of troll comment threads. Vicious stuff. Sometimes seeing a BMW and its driver pulverized by an oncoming truck while the Internet makes jokes is good driver's ed. Additionally, before YouTube diligently deletes most of the road rage videos–lest the sensitive Americans be traumatized by seeing people screaming "I will kill you bitch" and pummeling each other in the head with steel pipes, crowbars and car wrenches. Ru CHP also backs these up on a Latvian server.

To better understand and navigate this community service, here's a Russian Dash-cam Video Thesaurus for the blog tag cloud. It is comprised of purposely misspelled hick and thug slang and phrases used sarcastically…while people die. Ah, Russian humour.

поциент – "Patient." The poor bastard, the dumb idiot in the video getting pulverized, run over or smashed into. A wordplay of "potz," the Russian translation of the Yiddish "schmuck."

летчик – "Pilot." The idiot who zooms by and crashes in the grand finale of a video.

слабоумие и отвага – "Courage and dementia."

последние секунды жизни – "Last seconds of life." Videos featuring persons before and after fatal accidents.

кетай как всегда пиздец – "China is always fucked." Clips from China that feature severe crashes and frequently feature passerbys ignoring the bodies and car debris.

кирпичи – "Bricks" (as in "shitting bricks.") The audio track often features the driver panting or shouting the entire Russian vocabulary of swears at the top of their lungs. Used for videos with near misses or close shaves.

железобетонное очко – "Anus of Concrete." Honorific given to drivers who, faced with sudden danger like a huge truck coming head-on, remain calm, only saying "shoot" or "darn" quietly in the background, and efficiently steer away from danger, displaying some seriously fucking great driving skills.

наварра – The infamous video featuring a certain black Nissan Navarra pick-up swerving to the oncoming freightliner and being smashed into a cloud of small particles. The metaphor for a gruesome, intense, fatal accident.

There's another thing you should know about, hotrod: "The Drifters of Vladivostok." There's a particular flavor to disaster clips from Vladivostok. The far-Eastern port city uses Japanese sedans with right hand driver's side almost exclusively. There are readily available sporty Nissans and Toyotas fresh off the ferries from Japan a short distance away. As a result, the teenage population has access to many fast, powerful, inexpensive cars. The city of Vladivostock is much like San Francisco in terrain, with hilly streets and limited visibility. So you have these kids who barely know how to drive, armed with very powerful Japanese cars and cheap, used autos–often fitted with aftermarket nitrous systems. They regularly drive like crazy and perform some violent drifting maneuvers, intentionally over-steering and redlining the engine. The steep hills, the narrow, badly-maintained roads, right-hand vehicles drifting wildly on left-hand roads result in some cinematic, idiotic crashes. And that's the flavor of Vladivostok: The spice of suddenly smoking tires and sound of crumpling plastic.

But there are moments of humanity among the crashes, in between the skidding, the burning, the kicking. There are dash-cam videos with happy endings. At a city accident scene, you could see as many as twenty cars pulling over, drivers running out to the scene. And then there are the resolutions, a sort of "brotherhood of the road" moments–forgiveness seen only on long-distance, intercity highways, especially between truck drivers. This comes from the recognition of the fact that on a 300-mile stretch of uninhabited territory, help can only come from passing vehicles and not emergency services. Most Russian long-distance routes East of the Ural Mountains are that way. There is really only one highway like that in North America: the Western Canadian to Alaskan Stretch of the Pan-American Highway.

It's common in the Russian winter for light passenger cars to swerve off the road. Imagine a lone Ford Focus tipped-over in a pile of snow by the road. Imagine pulling over, rescuing the deserted traveler from hours of waiting for costly rescue services. The comradery between strangers, shoveling the snow and hailing a freight truck or tractor to pull the car out. The kudos. The cheers. The knowledge that you could be very well be next.

And don't you forget it. Aside from the kindness of strangers, it's just you and that little gadget versus the hell that is the other people on the road.


This story originally appeared on ANIMALNEWYORK on June 13, 2012, and was republished with permission.

Email us with the subject line "Syndication" if you would like to see your own story syndicated here on Jalopnik.

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