The Onion Daily Dispatch - November 20, 2012

Tue Nov 20, 2012 www.theonion.com

8-Year-Old Palestinian Boy Pleasantly Surprised He Hasn't Been Killed Yet 11.19.12 GAZA CITY—As civilian casualties continue to mount amid the escalating conflict along the Gaza Strip, 8-year-old Palestinian boy Walid Suleiman expressed both joy and astonishment Monday that he has yet to be killed in an Israeli military attack. News in Brief » Area Father Beginning To Suspect 3-Year-Old A Real Ding-Dong American Voices » Anonymous Declares Cyberwar On Israel “If anything can end a generations-old conflict over the Holy Land, it’s minor inconveniences.” opinion » Come On, Just Open The Door And Let Me In This Once by A Raccoon By A Raccoon Radio News » Kentucky Legislature Bans Gay Pet Weddings

featured section: » Horoscope » Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 The stars foretell of a mad prophet rising in the east in the moon's next cycle. They hope this somehow helps you with your life. Most Popular » U.S. Headed For Fiscal Cliff Only College Student Staying On Campus Planning Saddest Thanksgiving Meal Of All Time Area Woman Finally Uploads All 12 Million Pictures Of Her Vacation To Europe On Facebook Caffeinated Cracker Jacks To Debut Area Man Constantly Mentioning He Doesn't Own A Television 8-Year-Old Palestinian Boy Pleasantly Surprised He Hasn't Been Killed Yet

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