The Onion Daily Dispatch - November 02, 2012

Fri Nov 02, 2012 www.theonion.com

Atlantic City Faces Long Recovery Before It Can Start Destroying Lives Again 11.02.12 ATLANTIC CITY, NJ—In the wake of Hurricane Sandy, Atlantic City officials warned Friday that it could take weeks or even months for the storm-ravaged gambling hub to fully repair its infrastructure and get back to utterly and completely ruining peop... News in Brief » Report: Only Way Nation Will Pay Attention To Climate Change Is If Julia Roberts Dies In Hurricane American Voices » Record High Unemployment Hits Eurozone “That’s terrible. How will all those people be able to afford health care?” opinion » This May Not Be The Ideal Moment Politically, But It’s Time To Talk Reparations by Barack Obama, Incumbent Candidate For President Of The United States By Barack Obama Radio News » Unicycling Bear's Agent Has Long List Of Demands

featured section: » Horoscope » Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 Self-improvement may be a noble goal, but the stars aren’t so sure the leg rests, dual cup-holders, and wood paneling are what people had in mind. Most Popular » Atlantic City Faces Long Recovery Before It Can Start Destroying Lives Again Record High Unemployment Hits Eurozone Shitload Of Math Due Monday Romney Pitches In To Repair Thousands Of Downed Romney-Ryan Lawn Signs This May Not Be The Ideal Moment Politically, But It’s Time To Talk Reparations Nation Suddenly Realizes This Just Going To Be A Thing That Happens From Now On

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