The Onion Daily Dispatch - August 14, 2012

Tue Aug 14, 2012 www.theonion.com

Coworker With Two Computer Screens Not Fucking Around 08.13.12 FORT WORTH, TX—Credible sources within your office reported Monday that the guy on the third floor with two computer screens on his desk is not fucking around. News in Brief » Jennifer Aniston Engaged To Guy Who Frankly Will Never Replace Brad American Voices » Beyoncé Sings At U.N. “Wow. I can’t believe she got to meet Ban Ki-moon!” opinion » Admit It, I Scare The Ever-Loving Shit Out Of You, Don't I? by Paul Ryan, Candidate for Vice President of the United States By Paul Ryan Radio News » God Worried Apocalypse May Not Live Up To Expectations

featured section: » Horoscope » Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 Four will be killed, 12 injured, and nearly 50 molested this week after your unconscious escapes. Most Popular » Admit It, I Scare The Ever-Loving Shit Out Of You, Don't I? Girls On The Gridiron Coworker With Two Computer Screens Not Fucking Around Focus: Who Is Paul Ryan? Fuck, Roommates Want To Have Meeting Your Republican Friend To Explain Why Paul Ryan Is Great Choice

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