The Onion Daily Dispatch - February 02, 2012

Thu Feb 02, 2012 www.theonion.com

'Huffington Post' Employee Sucked Into Aggregation Turbine 02.02.12 NEW YORK—Shocked and saddened witnesses at the Huffington Post's news-aggregation facility have confirmed that employee Henry Evers, 25, died Wednesday ... News in Brief » Gingrich Privately Regretting Not Doing 'More Jew Stuff' On Florida Campaign Trail American Voices » Facebook To Launch IPO “They may want to hold off on that—a few of my friends are threatening to leave Facebook over some of its new features.” opinion » Off The Top Of My Head by Jean Teasdale Love a good bargain as much as Jean Teasdale? Betcha you don't! For example, I don't call the third day of the week Tuesday anymore—I call it Doublecouponday! Radio News » Internet Collapses Under Sheer Weight Of Baby Pictures

featured section: » Horoscope » Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 You've got tough row to hoe in front of you this week, which seems like merely a folksy euphemism until you find you've inherited a run-down potato farm. Most Popular » 'Huffington Post' Employee Sucked Into Aggregation Turbine Brain-Dead Teen, Only Capable Of Rolling Eyes And Texting, To Be Euthanized Obama Criticized For Living In Lavish Mansion While Most Americans Struggle To Make Ends Meet Panelists Discussing GOP Debate Clearly Didn't Watch It Gingrich Privately Regretting Not Doing 'More Jew Stuff' On Florida Campaign Trail Internet Collapses Under Sheer Weight Of Baby Pictures

If you do not want to receive anymore emails from us, please click the following link unsubscribe. To unsubscribe via postal mail please send your request to: 536 Broadway New York NY, 10012 Please include the email address at which you have been contacted. All of our emails are sent from the domain http://www.theonion.com.