The Onion Daily Dispatch - November 08, 2012

Thu Nov 08, 2012 www.theonion.com

Todd Akin Spends Whole Night Wondering What Went Wrong 11.07.12 ST. LOUIS—Following a disappointing loss in his state’s U.S. Senate race to incumbent Claire McCaskill, Rep. News in Brief » CNN's John King Now Just Swiping Hands Across Everything American Voices » U.S. Suicide Rate Up Amid Economic Crisis “Makes sense. Nothing boosts morale or whisks your blues away quite like a full-time job.” opinion » This May Not Be The Ideal Moment Politically, But It’s Time To Talk Reparations by Barack Obama, Incumbent Candidate For President Of The United States By Barack Obama Radio News » Unicycling Bear's Agent Has Long List Of Demands

featured section: » Letters To The Editor » Dear The Onion, Your paper sets an unattainable standard of proper spelling and grammar that today’s youths will never be able to live up to. I bet you’re even going to correct the misspellings in this letter and break it into separate coherent sentences. Shame on you. — Patricia Auster, Easley, SC Most Popular » U.S. Suicide Rate Up Amid Economic Crisis Todd Akin Spends Whole Night Wondering What Went Wrong Romney Camp Retooling Campaign After Latest Setback Ron Paul Elected Ruler Of Planet Inhabited By 1 Billion Tiny Ron Pauls Nation's Women Wake Up Relieved To Find Selves Still In 2012 Millions Without Power Following Election

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