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Saturday, May 18, 2013

Cheat Sheet - Advice for Obama: Forget Bulworth. Try Rambo.

Today: MTA Train Collision Leaves 60 Injured , Pentagon Clears iPhones for Network Use , French President Signs Gay Marriage Into Law
Cheat Sheet: Afternoon

May 18, 2013
WRONG MOVIE

Obama has reportedly spoken about "going Bulworth." Michael Tomasky says that would be a terrible idea—and he has another Hollywood role model in mind for the president.

'EXTENSIVE DAMAGE'

Eight people remain hospitalized—three in critical condition—after two commuter trains carrying more than 700 people collided Friday night, according to Connecticut Governor Malloy. Speaking to press Saturday, the Metropolitan Transportation Authority reported "extensive infrastructure damage," that will keep normal service from returning until a "full investigation" is complete. The train derailed, injuring up to 60 people, after colliding with another train heading to Grand Central. "It was just a crazy scene...People were thrown," one passenger told the New Haven Register.

 

APP-ROVAL

Nothing says 'boss' like being chosen as the phone network for a pack of spies. The defense agency announced Friday that they have approved Apple products for use on their networks, meaning that iPhones and iPads, along with other gadgets, can be used by its employees. Apple joins Samsung and Blackberry on the list of smartphone manufacturers secure enough to meet the Pentagon's high standards. Needless to say, it's great news for Apple. Instragram just got real, people.

OUI, OUI!

Just one day after France's Constitutional Council approved the country's gay-marriage and adoption bill, French President François Hollande signed the bill into law. Although it was adopted by both the Senate and the National Assembly last month, right-wing opponents had taken one last stab at blocking the bill's passage by contesting it to the Council. Close, but no cigar. France is now the ninth country in Europe, and fourteenth in the world, to recognize gay marriage. The first same-sex weddings can take place as soon as ten days after the bill's signing.

LEANING IN

Is Marissa Mayer a fan of Dogshaming? Rumors are swirling that Yahoo is set to acquire Tumblr, favorite blogging site of short-form jokers and Bieber fans everywhere. The deal is reportedly worth up to $1 billion. The tech firm is holding a press conference in New York City, Tumblr's hometown, on Monday. Invitations to the press conference asked attendees to "join us as we share something special." We're having a hard time thinking of something more special than Tumblr.


MONKEY BUSINESS
Bieber Gets Big Bill for Pet Primate
For care during quarantine in Munich.
ENEMY FIRE
Report: North Korea Launches Missiles
Short-guided weapons shot on Saturday.
NO HANDS
Plane Belly Flops at Newark Int'l
Due to landing gear problems.
RACING ROYALTY
Preakness Darling On the Mend
2009 winner Rachel Alexandra better after life-threatening infection.
ALL MY SINGLE LADIES
Beyonce Responds to Pregnancy Rumors
"These low life people have nothing better to do."
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