The Onion Daily Dispatch - May 25, 2012

Fri May 25, 2012 www.theonion.com

Biden To Honor Fallen Soldiers By Jumping Motorcycle Over Vietnam Memorial 05.25.12 WASHINGTON—In an effort to honor fallen American soldiers this Memorial Day with a fittingly "badass" tribute, Vice President Joe Biden has announced plans to jump a motorcycle over the entire length of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial. Biden... News in Brief » Visiting Parents Unknowingly Strike Up Conversation With Parents Of Dorm's Blowjob Queen American Voices » 'Fifty Shades Of Grey' Series Reaches 10 Million Sales “Whatever happened to the good old days of finding a cheap paperback with women spanking each other on the cover in your dad's sock drawer?” opinion » Come On! There Has To Be One Person In This Goddamn School Who's Been Molested by Ted Bartlett, Guidance Counselor By Ted Bartlett, Guidance Counselor Radio News » Local Man Gets Stabbing Right On 47th Try

featured section: » Horoscope » Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 No one can argue effectively without the correct set of tools, so make sure you have a hammer in each hand. Most Popular » Biden To Honor Fallen Soldiers By Jumping Motorcycle Over Vietnam Memorial Once-Great Competitive Eater Reduced To Hustling At 10-Cent Wing Nights Quiet Temp Actually Very Untalented Singer-Songwriter Visiting Parents Unknowingly Strike Up Conversation With Parents Of Dorm's Blowjob Queen Skechers To Pay For Dubious Fitness Claims Scientists Find Thousands Of Previously Undiscovered Species Cowering In Amazon Rainforest

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