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Friday, August 10, 2012

The Onion Daily Dispatch - August 10, 2012

The Onion

Herman Cain Lifts Suspension Of Presidential Campaign 08.10.12

ATLANTA—More than eight months after suspending his campaign amidst plummeting poll numbers and allegations of sexual misconduct, Georgia businessman Herman Cain appeared at a spirited rally Friday to announce he was officially lifting the suspensio...

News in Brief »

NASA Calls It A Mission As Curiosity Rover Fills Up Whole 2-Gigabyte Memory Card

American Voices »

July Was Hottest Month Ever In U.S.

“Are we sure this isn’t just part of the earth’s natural cycle of heating up to unprecedented levels?”

opinion »

I'm Proud Of All My Songs, Even The Ones I Stole From People I Heard At Open-Mic Nights

by Paul Simon

By Paul Simon

Radio News »

God Worried Apocalypse May Not Live Up To Expectations

featured section: »

Horoscope »

Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19

Four will be killed, 12 injured, and nearly 50 molested this week after your unconscious escapes.

Most Popular »
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