The Onion Daily Dispatch - May 31, 2012

Thu May 31, 2012 www.theonion.com

Shadows Meet The Clouds, Gray On Gray, Like Dusty Charcoal On An Ashen Brow, Nation's Poets Report 05.31.12 NEW YORK—According to a growing consensus of U.S. poets, shadows—inky sharp as a raven's beak—meet the sullen bloat of clouds, their hues a pallid loam, each a dancer, each alone, like dusty charcoal on an ashen brow. Citing both the age... News in Brief » Nabisco Tentatively Adds Hummus To List Of Approved Ritz Toppings American Voices » Dylan, Albright, Morrison Receive Medal Of Freedom “This is just an honorary medal, though, right? He’s not really going to let these guys go free, is he?” opinion » Hey, Everybody! This Cool New Tide Detergent Video Is Blowing Up All Over The Internet! by Fred Hammond , Director Of Digital Video And Social Media Ad Integration, Tide Detergent Hey, everybody, have you seen this awesome new web video from Tide detergent? I just checked it out online and, man, it is easily one of the coolest digital videos I've ever seen. Radio News » Local Man Gets Stabbing Right On 47th Try

featured section: » Letters To The Editor » Dear The Onion, Last week you published a letter from me—Jim Swanson—but guess what? That wasn't me, that was my identical twin brother, Tim. Ha-ha, got you! — Jim Swanson (or is it Tim?!), Minneapolis (or is it St. Paul?!), MN Most Popular » Shadows Meet The Clouds, Gray On Gray, Like Dusty Charcoal On An Ashen Brow, Nation's Poets Report Dylan, Albright, Morrison Receive Medal Of Freedom Money Man Pulls Even With Black Guy In Latest Poll Obama Presides Over Secret 'Kill List' Hey, Everybody! This Cool New Tide Detergent Video Is Blowing Up All Over The Internet! Big 12 Agrees To Annual Bowl Loss Against SEC

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