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Sunday, August 18, 2013

Group Of Friends Engage In Passionate, Incoherent Discussion About Current Events - August 18, 2013

The Onion

Area Teen Quickly Running Out Of Chances To Be First Openly Gay Anything 08.16.13

PEORIA, IL—Citing the increased visibility of gay athletes, politicians, and officials, area teen and homosexual Alex Zaragoza, 15, told reporters today that he is worried about running out of opportunities to become the first openly gay member of a...

News in Brief »

Chinese Newlyweds Wondering What They’re Going To Do With All This Medicinal Bear Bile

American Voices »

Government Finally Admits Existence Of Area 51

“Why would they admit that?! Maybe there’s something they’re covering up!”

opinion »

It Says Here On Your Résumé, Mr. Zimmerman, That You Shot A Boy?

by Bryan Timmons, Regional Manager

By Bryan Timmons, Regional Manager

Radio News »

New Crispy Snack Cracker To Ease Crushing Pain Of Modern Life

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Horoscope »

Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19

Unexpected and startling events in the coming days will compel you to become more familiar with your monthly menstrual cycle.

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