November 15th, 2012Top StoryNew York Times Takes Its Clients Out to Dinner at NYT-Designated Worst Restaurant in the Entire WorldBy Caity Weaver
If you watched the Today Show's complete coverage of The Biggest News Story of 2012 (The New York Times published a medium-funny scathing review of a restaurant everyone expected to hate), you might have noticed that, after Guy Fieri said his piece and forced poor Savannah to choke down a Vaseline-covered cardboard box he had sprinkled with Styrofoam pieces—"Meatloaf, Savannah!"— Today invited a team of Random Professionals You Recognize (Star Jones, Donny Deutsch, and Dr. Phil) to further analyze the greatest human rights violation of the modern era. When it was Dr. Phil's turn to speak, he mentioned that the Times so high and mighty on her throne of pearl, had, in fact, "hosted a 160 person party at that restaurant" the day Pete Wells' review was printed. The Braiser dug a little deeper into that comment. Guy's American Shitshow & Clusterfuck confirmed that a Times party had occurred there. The New York Times' denied having held a company-sponsored event at the restaurant. Guy's American Hellhole That Only Serves Poison insisted that a Times event had in fact just taken place there. Finally, the Times realized that, oh yes, some of its representatives had held an event at Guy's the day the review was published. It was a party, organized by the paper's ad sales department for clients. Why is the New York Times feeding dog food, nothing but food for dirty old dogs, to its clients? If any New York Times clients turned off by the paper's wining and dining them with blue drinks and toasted marshmallows that "taste like fish" are on the hunt for a new company to support, might we recommend Gawker Media, where the only drink is Purple Drank and the marshmallows taste like...whatever you want them to taste like. Diamonds of flavor. Guy Fieri. Marshmallows, whatever. We appreciate your business. [The Braiser // Image via Getty] |
|
No comments:
Post a Comment