The Onion Weekly Dispatch - May 09, 2012

Wed May 09, 2012 www.theonion.com

Obama Blasts Obama's Evasive Stance On Gay Marriage 05.09.12 WASHINGTON—President Barack Obama lashed out at President Barack Obama's seemingly evasive stance on gay marriage Tuesday, calling the head-of-state's cagey position on the issue both "cowardly" and "an example of faile... Paula Deen Sponsors .05K Walk For Diabetes Research News in Brief » Loophole In Curse Lets Archaeologist Off The Hook Maya Angelou Thought She’d Be Invited To More White House Stuff Justice Breyer Unable To Look At Anything Without Deliberating Constitutionality Of It American Voices » Maurice Sendak Dead At 83 "Stroke is the most common complication of participating in a wild rumpus." Film 'Neighborhood Watch' Gets Name Change video » This Week In History: Sears Tower Constructed With Bold Challenge To God Engraved On Roof (1972) The Onion reflects on the discovery of the first lesbian, the joyous Hindenburg explosion, and the Sears Tower's challenge to God opinion » Smoove Is Remodeling by Smoove B, Love Man By Smoove B Radio News » Stigmatic Teen Says His Miracle Is Gross

featured section: » Horoscope » Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19 You've tried everything you can think of to stop yourself from gaining weight. Unfortunately, you have your best ideas while eating entire coconut-cream pies. Most Popular »

If you do not want to receive anymore emails from us, please click the following link unsubscribe. To unsubscribe via postal mail please send your request to: 536 Broadway New York NY, 10012 Please include the email address at which you have been contacted. All of our emails are sent from the domain http://www.theonion.com.