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Wednesday, May 16, 2012

How I've Been Playing Diablo III, You Know, Aside From Sporadically

May 16th, 2012Top Story

How I've Been Playing Diablo III, You Know, Aside From Sporadically

By Mike Fahey

How I've Been Playing Diablo III, You Know, Aside From Sporadically While Diablo III's error codes are being raved over by the gaming press, they've also managed to add an exciting element of chance to the review process.

Since Diablo III's servers weren't ready for play until 3AM Pacific (ready being a relative term) yesterday morning, a launch day review was pretty much out of the question. Esteemed members of the gaming press weren't able to play the full game early; needless to say I wasn't either.

So I'm right there with the rest of the world, desperately hoping that the next time the game launches won't be the last time before hours of system maintenance.

Here's where I'm at right now.

Who I Play
For my initial play through I selected the Demon Hunter, as I've always been a big fan of crossbows and capes. I selected a female character, because if I am going to be looking at an isometric view of an ass completely obscured by armor and only visible while the avatar is fighting things on the top half of the screen, it might as well be a pretty one.

Okay, that old MMORPG trope doesn't hold up. I just like playing female characters. It's a thing with me, and this thing just happens to click massive amounts of ass, so it works out in the end.

What I've Played
I've managed to reach the third chapter of Act Two of Diablo III so far, with my time played sitting at nearly nine hours. My Demon Hunter, Kotaku, has reached level 19. I've collected 35,773 gold pieces, killed 112 elite creatures, amassed 3,040 kills and earned 180 achievement points over the course of my career.

I began playing solo Tuesday morning at around 8AM Eastern, playing on and off throughout the day until the servers went down that afternoon.

Once servers came back up I joined a friend for some co-op action. You may have heard of him.

How I've Been Playing Diablo III, You Know, Aside From Sporadically

Our adventures lasted for several hours, until the game locked up and I couldn't log back in.

This morning, following a brief nap, I managed to squeeze in another hour before duty called.

I've invested heavily in crafting, training my blacksmith up to Adept level. He can now craft items three levels above my character's ability to equip them, so I'd say I am keeping up nicely.

How I Play
With my fingers planted on the shift key, keeping my feet firmly planted and sniping from afar.

The Demon Hunter is a ranged character. During the early stages of the game going toe-to-toe with hordes of beasties is a viable tactic, but as the challenge increases so does the amount of distance the Demon Hunter needs between herself and the eager claws of the enemy.

I seem to have developed a favorite skill configuration early on. For my primary attack I prefer Entangling Shot, an arrow that slows enemies' approach, giving me time to unleash my preferred secondary skill, Rapid Fire. Rapid Fire is Diablo III's answer to the machine gun. It lays waste to everything in its path.

Entangling Shot is modified with a Shock Collar rune, which manifests the skills slowing effect as electrified chains. Rapid Fire gets the Web Shot rune, further slowing enemy advances. With my trusty Templar NPC charging headlong into the fray, this is a winning combination. I've made a point to try out every new skill and rune that's been unlocked, but this is the one that works for me.

Rounding out my current skill lineup are Shadow Power (temporary life gain per kill), Spike Trap (basically a mine), Companion (a crow that bites enemies on the face), and Strafe (evasive move plus scattered arrows).

What's Left to Play

My plan is to finish the story on normal difficulty with my current character, continue briefly at a higher one, and then give each of the other classes a good hour or two of play.

How long will that take? Well that all depends on Blizzard. This is a developer that doesn't release its exciting new errors until they're done, so I never know what to expect. Give me a day or two; we'll see how it goes.

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'Stand Your Ground': Ladies, You Have No Ground to Stand on

May 16th, 2012Top Story

'Stand Your Ground': Ladies, You Have No Ground to Stand on

By Mobutu Sese Seko

'Stand Your Ground': Ladies, You Have No Ground to Stand onAh, Florida, cradle of justice. One day, when they document the great codifiers of the law, the names will ring out: Hammurabi, Solon, Justinian, Blackstone, Napoleon, Tallahassee. Last Friday, the state that's hosted the politically ugly Trayvon Martin reality show handed down a 20-year sentence against Marissa Alexander.

The two cases beg for comparison. Martin, an African American teen, was chased, beaten and shot by a self-appointed neighborhood watchman named George Zimmerman. Zimmerman claimed he feared for his life and had to stand his ground. Alexander, a 31-year-old African American mom with a Master's degree, claimed the same thing in her defense against an abusive husband. Zimmerman went free the night of his shooting and wasn't booked for murder for 45 days, until officials were shamed by an international outcry. Alexander—who has been incarcerated since Feb. 8, 2010—will, thanks to Florida's automatic sentencing laws, spend roughly the next 7,300 in prison.

The easy conclusion to reach is that the justice system in the state of Florida tolerates firing guns at, into, and through black people, but that their possessing and using guns themselves is a public safety crisis that must be stamped out immediately. As a long-time resident of the state, I can attest to the fact that there is no shortage of citizens who would advocate this point of view, often publicly, in predominantly white bars, at the point in the evening when drunk people have figured out exactly everything wrong with the world and realize that you have not.

Alexander's case, however, is more complicated than that.

On Aug. 1, 2010, Alexander began fighting with her 36-year-old husband Rico Gray in the house where she lived. The two had been living separately following a 2009 incident in which he shoved her down into a bathtub and she hit her head hard enough to need a hospital visit. In a deposition, Gray admitted to hitting her, as well as having "five baby mamas," all of whom he hit except one, all of whom "never knew what I was thinking or what I might do. Hit them, push them." Prior to the August incident, Gray also admits that he and Alexander had had four or five other violent domestic clashes.

What muddies this story immediately is that Alexander filed a 2009 restraining order against Gray, then later amended the order so that the two could have contact and married him. She changed her mind about the no-contact provision after learning she was pregnant with his child, although prior to the 2010 shooting, she still lived with her mother and not with Gray.

The August 1 incident is likewise less than simple. Alexander claims that Gray discovered texts on her phone from her ex-husband and flew into a rage, hitting her, attempting to strangle her and threatening that no one else could have her. She tried to flee out the garage, but the garage door mechanism was broken, leaving her cornered in the dark without a cell phone or keys to her truck. She got her (licensed and concealed-carry permitted) gun from her glove compartment and re-entered the home, expecting that Gray and her two stepsons might have left. She discovered that Gray and the stepsons hadn't left, and when he charged at her and said, "Bitch, I will kill you," she fired a warning shot angled up and away from him. He then ran out with his kids and called the police, claiming that she had shot at him and his sons.

This account gets further complicated by two more factors. One, Gray initially agreed with almost all of Alexander's statement before contradicting it. He first said that the garage door was broken and that she couldn't leave, that he had threatened to have her beaten up by his friends. Most importantly, he said she'd had no intention of shooting him:

She knew the relationships I been in and I put my hand on her before. I honestly think she just didn't want me to put my hands on her anymore, so she did what she feel like she have to do to make sure she wouldn't get hurt, you know.... The gun was never actually pointed at me. When she raised the gun down and raised it up, you know, the gun was never pointed at me.

Then the story changed to accord more with his 911 call. Two, Alexander assaulted Gray while out on bail. She claims that she visited him to sign health insurance papers for their child that she'd given birth to, nine days prior to the August 1 incident, but that he cornered her in the garage and attacked her again when their friends were in another part of the house. She was admitted to a hospital that night with injuries consistent with being struck in the face.

Other details exacerbate the matter further. The prosecution claimed that the shot Alexander fired was at a height one could reasonably infer was meant to strike Gray: "It's not a warning shot when you fire and it comes in at about head level through the wall and only then goes up into the ceiling and into the living room." Meanwhile, Alexander's family has noted that she was a confident hand with a gun and had visited shooting ranges all her life. Alexander's ex-husband adds that the prosecution did not use additional photo evidence that showed the trajectory of the bullet passed upward and out of the room, into the ceiling, but that only prompts the question: Did Alexander's defense team use them, and did they argue the trajectory was true and not a ricochet?

Legal arguments and personnel surrounding this violent domestic conflict most strongly link it to the Trayvon Martin killing. Of Marissa Alexander's actions, prosecutor Angela Corey said,

She didn't fire into the ceiling. [Alexander's representatives] are blatantly lying. She fired the shot toward the living room, where they were, at an adult that she was angry with. She might have been angry at him, but what if that bullet had struck one of those kids? Who would be crying for Marissa Alexander then? Who fights for those two children? She fired at two children. These two young boys had no choice... Marissa Alexander made her decision.

Corey is a Duval County prosector, and not responsible for the initial investigation into the Martin killing in Seminole County. But she has been assigned the prosecution of George Zimmerman. Given those ties, it's hard to hear her "won't someone please think of the children!" hand-wringing and not think of the heel-ruts dug into the earth by every person in the criminal justice system who had to be dragged near Martin's dead body. Trayvon Martin was a child, too. He deserved an advocacy as zealous as the one afforded to two children who walked away alive, who might not have been in the room where a gun was shot (one of the children in Alexander's case has changed his testimony, just as his father did), who might have stood in another room as their father attempted to terrorize Marissa Alexander just as George Zimmerman did a teen with an iced-tea can.

The parallels don't end with the prosecutor. Although Corey likewise dismisses Alexander's claim that her actions were acceptable under Florida's Stand Your Ground law, CBSNews reported that Alexander's

judge rejected a motion by Alexander's attorney to grant her immunity under the "stand your ground" law. According to the judge's order, "there is insufficient evidence that the Defendant reasonably believed deadly force was needed to prevent death or great bodily harm to herself," and that the fact that she came back into the home, instead of leaving out the front or back door "is inconsistent with a person who is in genuine fear for her life."

The ruling is galling in light of the Martin killing, when you consider that George Zimmerman ignored a 911 dispatcher's comment that they did not need him to exit his car and pursue Trayon Martin, that he then hunted Martin through a neighborhood, fought him and shot him. Zimmerman walked free on the basis of a Stand Your Ground self-defense, despite not driving away in his safe and locked SUV, tracking and confronting the imminent Skittles-snacking threat to his life and engaging him in a fight.

Worse, the judge's ruling galls on the basis of the fucking statute (emphases mine):

776.012 
A person is justified in the use of deadly force and does not have a duty to retreat if:

(1) He or she reasonably believes that such force is necessary to prevent imminent death or great bodily harm to himself or herself

Consider the decision made against Alexander again: the judge ruled that Alexander, who was in her mother's home and the place where she had been a resident for months, somehow had a duty to retreat from her home, in contravention of both the Stand Your Ground statute and the Castle Doctrine concept from which it sprung. Moreover, she should have left from the garage whose inoperable door even the alleged victim, Gray, admitted she could not use. He also initially acknowledged in a deposition that he blocked her only other egress while threatening to have her beaten up, and that he'd beaten her before, by his own admission, four or five times. According to her—and according to him—he said no one else could have her, then allegedly charged at her while threatening to kill her. Nonetheless, the judge concluded that she did not reasonably believe that shooting a gun without actually shooting a person was necessary to prevent great bodily harm to herself. This time, apparently.

Given the above, given the Martin context, it's hard not to think that when someone guns down a black person in Florida, that's just cleanup. But when a black person starts shooting off a gun, then you've got a real problem. Publicly, maybe that's how it plays. Legally, it's worse.

The implications of the Alexander conviction and sentencing go deeper. It has taken decades for American courts to get past the antiquated notion that a wedding ring constitutes absolute consent for any treatment, that husbands can actually rape and terrorize wives, that being a spouse to a woman you abuse does not immunize you from criminal prosecution. Not only does the Alexander ruling transgress the obscenely liberal affirmative defense of Stand Your Ground, it appears to decline it to wives.

Marissa Alexander wasn't afforded the privilege of being subject to repeated beatings and an in-the-moment strangling and having it count substantially in favor of her arguing that she "reasonably" believed she could be subject to great bodily harm. That wasn't good enough, despite a history of domestic violence, a modified restraining order and being in a home that was not her husband's. What signal does that send to women who live with their husbands, who don't have court orders, who don't have documented hospital and police reports of physical abuse? If an actual paper trail is bullshit, then the first offense is free. Beating a woman might as well be like signing up for the Columbia House Record Club: it's just free shit at first, but if you don't pay attention, eventually it might cost you.

"Mobutu Sese Seko" is founder of the blog Et tu, Mr. Destructo?

Image by Jim Cooke.

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How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to Suck

May 16th, 2012Top Story

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to Suck

By Charlie Jane Anders

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckRight now, in the middle of summer movie season, it's easy to get sensory overload. Big-budget movies are coming thick and fast, each of them trying to overwhelm us into opening our wallets. And the more movies you go to see, the more hyperactive trailers you're going to see on the big screen.

Is it possible to tell just from the trailer that a movie is going to blow chunks? We believe it is. Put those 15 minutes before the movie you came to see to good use, by gathering crucial clues that can help you avoid a wasted movie outing in future. Here's our handy guide to becoming a movie trailer detective.

We know what you're going to say at this point: Trailers are good at being deceptive. They often cherry-pick the handful of great scenes from a movie. They use music and other tricks to make the films look cooler than they really are. All too often, they use scenes that aren't actually in the movie. The people who make these things are often better at their jobs than the people who make the actual movies.

That's all true — but you can use those strengths against them. The more tricks you can catch a trailer using, the likelier it is that the people cutting the trailer together were struggling mightily to make this movie look decent. (This is obviously going to be truer for trailers that were made after a film was done filming, rather than early teaser trailers, that might have been cut together while a film was still being made.)

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckThere's no dialogue
Any movie, no matter how terrible, can string together a few shots of people staring into the camera wordlessly while shit happens around them. But if they can't find even one scene where someone opens his or her mouth and speaks, without it looking ridiculous, then we're in trouble.

There's a buttload of unfunny jokes
This is sort of a gimme, but worth mentioning. Says Jackson West, "If there's even one joke that falls flat, it means that you've already seen all the good jokes in the film and they ran out when cutting the trailer." Also: If there's some up-and-coming indy hipster comedian who's probably in the movie for ten minutes, and the trailer leans heavily on that person being cute, RUN AWAY.

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckThe only dialogue is ridiculously cheeseball
This one is really a judgment call — a lot of great movies have cheeseball dialogue. But especially if the trailer heavily emphasizes someone shouting and bugging out while saying something uber-dramatic like "There's no going back," or "Win or lose, this ends tonight." At least you know it's going to be a midnight movie.

Dog Reaction Shots.
If they have to show you a dog's reaction to the events that are happening on screen, that's probably a pretty bad sign. They don't think you'll know how to react without a dog letting you know.

A pretty woman does an over-the-top pratfall
This is mostly in romantic comedies, but also in other types of films. Comedian Emily Heller describes this one thusly: "Whoooaaaa! She's clumsy! She has a FLAW! She falls down! That's the only thing wrong with her though because otherwise she's a 10."

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckA lot of shots are obviously from the final reel
If you can tell that a lot of the cool stuff in the trailer is from the last 30 minutes of the movie, then that's probably a sign that nothing interesting happens for the first 90 minutes. (You can usually tell.)

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckThe trailer gives away the entire movie
"Bad movies have a way of telegraphing themselves," says Dashiell Bennett, who used to blog about movie trailers over at Precogs.net. Often, if the trailer spills every single plot point in the movie, it shows a lack of confidence. Plus the movie is flimsy enough that you can summarize it in two minutes.

Random credits
Bennett offers another rule: When the trailer says "From the People Who Brought You [Title of Other Movie]" but won't mention their names. Or when it says "A Film by [Random Name]" and it's someone you've never heard of. Run away!

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckThe trailer is at least 30 percent slow-mo
Maybe you like movies with a lot of slow-mo. It can be used well, like for some martial arts sequences. But if a movie's trailer leaves you with the impression that the director of the film is probably just going to be squashing the "slow advance" button on the remote the whole time, so you appreciate the coolness of this particular truck flipping over, that could be a major warning sign. A trailer should move fast, because it's only two minutes long and it's supposed to be exciting. Not majestic.

They try to make it look too much like a cool music video
Sort of a related note. A lot of action movie directors started out in music videos, so it's not surprising that movie trailers are emphasizing this note. But we've noticed a direct correlation between a film's big trailer being music-video-esque, with lots of slow shots and a crashing rock anthem, and the movie turning out to be blah.

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckThe special effects look obviously unfinished and weak
It's kind of amazing that we even have to mention this, but it's a thing. A lot of movie trailers lately feature unfinished CG and rendering that would be laughed out of a video game cut scene ten years ago. And the sad fact is, often this is a cue that the final movie is going to look terrible as well, because they're behind on their deliverables and scrambling to make up the lost time. Studios seem to keep shortening the timeframe in which you're supposed to deliver a finished movie, and you can often tell.

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckThey try to make it look like a totally different movie than what you already know it is
You know this movie is a cheesy action-adventure film, but suddenly the trailers are trying to make it look like a cheesy romantic comedy instead. This is because they've decided it's a weak action-adventure film, but they think they can possibly trick a few women into going and seeing it for the romance that's in three scenes of the actual movie.

Click to view It's an action movie but the trailer is trying to look emo
The one that sticks in my mind is this Terminator Salvation trailer that tries really really hard to make it look deeply emotional and "intense." But there were a number of terrible action movies that tried for the "emo" vibe in their trailers for a while there, and you still see this sometimes.

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckYou've seen five trailers for the same movie, and you've noticed there are only three cool bits, repeated over and over.
Again, this is one that we notice a lot. When you have a movie where exactly three cool things happen — like, say, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, the trailers are going to run out of cool things to showcase and start looking repetitive. If you go see a lot of movies and thus see a lot of different trailers for the same film, this one might jump out at you.

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckThere are a lot of boring things cut very quickly to make them look exciting. Perhaps with a thud thud thud in between
We called this one out a while ago. A lot of movie trailers use the "short flashes of stuff that might or might not be interesting" technique, interspersed with blackouts and sometimes a loud "thud" sound or a rising whine. If you notice that most of the things you're just seeing for a split second are just people brushing their teeth, that's a sign of something.

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckYou hear the same song, or the same weird sound effects, that you've already heard a million times before.
Like when every trailer had to have the Inception BRAAAAMMM noise, or the same piece of music that had already been in a dozen other trailers. Not necessarily a sign of anything other than the fact that the person making the trailer was phoning it in — and possibly feeling very uninspired by this movie.

How to Tell From a Trailer That a Movie Is Going to SuckIf you didn't notice the movie title, you'd have no clue what movie this was
This is the ultimate one. If it looks absolutely like the generic Everymovie, and you can't even tell what film you've just watched a trailer for — it's got stuff blowing up and a guy scowling, and a car flipping over, plus some CG shapes — then this is a movie that has no identity of its own, and it's probably going to be derivative crap.

Thanks to Katharine Trendacosta, Lyn Rapoport, Emily Heller, Cia Bernales, Dashiell Benett, Kelly Faircloth, Genevieve Valentine and Jackson West for the input!

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